When the Husband is Away, the Wife Will Play.

My husband and his friends host a clinic for baseball and softball coaches every January, and when he left me a single mom yesterday, I decided to take today off and enjoy a long weekend with the kids. The expectation for a fun Friday wasn’t very high; in fact, knowing that our first order of … Continue reading →

Oversharing: Hi, Daddy!

It’s official: my dad has begun reading my blog. This is exciting because the Daddy’s Girl in me wants nothing more than two thumbs up from the guy. This is also terrifying because I intend to continue discussing intimate details of my life, such as bowel movements, and I fear he may never want to … Continue reading →

Saving Our Economy One Toddler at a Time

My son doesn’t mind a good old-fashioned time-out. In fact, he entertains himself to the point where the rest of us wish we were timed-out with him. As a result, we’ve had to get creative with our discipline techniques. Yesterday, after he lowered his shoulder and flatted his sister à la James Harrison, I told him … Continue reading →

To Thine Own Self be Shoe.

This summer while chasing two toddlers from the onslaught of crashing waves lounging on the beach, my husband casually remarked how footprints in the sand are here one minute and gone the next. He wondered, naturally, if any of his footprints would ever stand the test of time. His musings had great potential for an … Continue reading →

Mama Knows Best

If you’ve been following my craziness for a while, you know my son is going to preschool for the first time this year. The first day wasn’t necessarily a cake walk, but I thought it would get easier. WRONG! Brady bawled the first day; the second day he bawled just the same. He couldn’t get into my … Continue reading →

Pre-School, Day 1

I had to write about this because so many of you parents can relate. Also, I’m hoping a sense of humor can sustain the entire human race, not to mention those of us who had to send our perfect little angels off to school for the first time. *Sob* Part I: The Drop Off Despite … Continue reading →

How to REALLY Raise Your Kids.

Despite the multitude of “How to Raise Your Child” lists we have all come across in our Pinteresting endeavors, it’s evident that the parents who should be reading them are not. I don’t mean to sound judgmental, but if people this DUMB insist on procreating, then we’re all screwed. Please do take a moment to let the emphatic idiocy of … Continue reading →

Hungry, Anyone?

I took a short hiatus from blogging not by choice, but by necessity. Why? The Family Vacation. Five adults + two kids = renting a van so big that the elderly automatically assume we are kidnappers, but hey, it gets us (and all of our crap) where we are going. Once there, it became instantly … Continue reading →

Numbers

I don’t do well with numbers. For many years, I swore I was dyslexic mostly just to mask how ridiculously awful I am at math. The other day I bought a coffee and the smart ass clerk rung me up at “103 pennies.” I started to sweat. Yes, that’s how bad it is. (I blushed for … Continue reading →

Look, Kids! Mommy’s in a Straight Jacket!

I enjoy many things in life. Red wine, white wine, naps. One thing I do not enjoy is the feeling of being a complete, raving, off-my-rocker lunatic. And unfortunately, that pretty much sums me up lately. I thought for sure the words of a former student were ringing true; he must be right, I am … Continue reading →